Birthdays have always been hard for me. Even as a child, well maybe a little older, more like 12-13 for some reason they became a hurtful time in my life. I really don’t know why. I don’t ever remember any tragedy or bad thing happening, I just remember as far back as I can, that around that time, I would cry more, be sadder more. It has not changed. I still really look forward to my birthday and am excited and tell everyone its my birthday, but when it comes down to it. It’s sad.
Now, I must be really spoiled or expecting too much, but I always feel like no one really cares. I know in my head that they do. Maybe, its because my parents are gone, my oldest brother is gone, and my other siblings really don’t remember that I am still alive. I start to feel sorry for myself and I guess that is why I need to confess that here. Mike always tries to make it special, the kids too, try really hard to let me have MY day. I am still sad…. So far today, I have had a great day. Mike and Erin took me to Edelweiss, my fav for breakfast. Erin and I sold more books that we found in the basement, (more for the basement remodel) Mike sold the old car that Grandpa left here ( more for the remodel) Blue, Brody and Kristin called, I received hydrangeas and sugar free candy from Erin. So far it has been a great day, so why is there sadness??? I am asking the Lord for forgiveness for my selfish, spoiled attitude. I have a wonderful life, a super family that grows all the time that is loving. A husband who treats me like a queen. I really don’t feel disappointed, I just feel sad. Why??? Does anyone else have that??? I am really going to pray today that this is the year that the sadness is gone. If the Lord leads, please pray with me…Thanks….
I’m not sure what to say here, but I do understand that sadness. For alot of years I felt it. I had people around me, but felt like no one really understood me. You may not feel that part, but it made me really sad.
I pray that God shows you how He can fill that void; because only He can. Get quiet and listen for His voice.
I haven’t experienced it on a birthday, but I do understand what you’re talking about because I’ve experienced it at other times and not understood why.
Like when I was growing up, I used to feel that way at Christmas. And more recently I’ve felt the same kind of sadness at the strangest things, like watching a small town 4th of July parade, or a particularly beautiful sunset, or when the fire truck drives through the developments during the Christmas season, sirens blaring, all decorated and with a jolly Santa waving to the kids who come scurrying out of the buildings when they hear all the commotion. I really don’t have an explanation.
But anyway, I do wish you special blessings on your birthday!
Hi there!
I read Brody’s blog daily and floated over here when he said it was your birthday.
I know what you mean…and there’s no reason for it to be sad in my life either. I think for me it just brings up lots of thoughts about where I am in life and all kinds of emotions and memories flood my mind.
So for you, I pray that the Lord would use this time to speak to you. That you would be released from the sadness of it, and move into growth and joy on each next birthday! And that there would be freedom from worrying about why it happens, and you would just be able to release it and be filled with love and joy!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! Enjoy the great moments and the people who love you!!!
Hola!!!
I have a hard time with birthdays, too, for no particular reason. I don’t think you’re being spoiled or selfish. Actually, it sounds like it’s an attack from the enemy.
Just think of this: birthdays are “supposed” to be a time when we can celebrate our lives and share our joy with those we love. Right? What are some things our enemy hates? Love, joy, family… What does the Bible say about him? He comes to kill, steal and destroy. SO if he can kill our joy, steal our peace and destroy our enjoyment of our family, he’s happy about that…so he’ll try.
My recommendation would be (and it generally works) to rebuke the enemy every time you get a negative “sad” thought today. I often will say something like, “God, I praise you for this fantastic day!” And the Bible promises that if we resist the devil, he will flee. It’s a lot of work and when I’m tired, I have a hard time resisting those negative thoughts, but we really are supposed to take every thought captive, right? It’s work, but it’s worth it!
I hope that this birthday was a very special time for you! Sorry I missed it!!!! :^)
Blessings!!!!!
Hi!
I came here by way of Brody’s blog because he was mentioned on the Avila’s blog. Anyway, I wanted to wish you a Happy Belated Birthday, because birthdays are very difficult for me as well. I think it started when my brother and his family moved to another state and joined what we believe to be a cult. Birthdays remind me that my family no longer feels whole, I think. Since then, I have had birthdays where I cry and cry and want to be happy, but am not. The next day I will be perfectly fine. I think another poster mentioned how the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy. I feel like that is what happens with me, too. My husband has begun to pray over my birthdays very fervently. This past year I felt like the depression somewhat lifted. I am thankful he did spiritual battle for me!!
Thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment. I hope you will find more joy and reasons to celebrate your birthday as you get older. Just ask the Lord to give you that joy and peace as the years pass. He is faithful.
I have a saying, “The Lord gives us our relatives so we will know how to choose our friends.”